Tag Archives: zombie

A Beginning in the End pt. 22

Logan                                                                                                                  2020/1/16

There is another human being downstairs. It is the one thing that I have not dared to hope for. I did not even think it was possible that even if there was another survivor that I could find them in this giant world. The chances were so low that I had not dared to hope that I would ever find someone.

Her name is Arabella and I must say I am impressed. She does not look like much at first but she has survived this long which speaks volumes about the kind of person she is. She is beat up from years of hard living but she is still quite beautiful. She must be resourceful and talented as well to have lived this long.

I cannot remember the last time I felt so peacefully content as I do right now. I actually feel a bit of happiness. Just to hear another voice is such an amazing thing that I am nearly in a state of shock.

And yet despite how God has decided to bless me today I am on edge about this place after the story that Arabella told me today. Something is missing from the story and it makes me slightly nervous. I am determined not to worry about it tonight. I’m going to take this night to rest and have a bit more peace before I work to solve this mystery.

I am simply happy to have another human being in near proximity once more. I do not know if it will last but I am going to rest in it while I can. I do not have to talk to the air for a short time and that is all I could ask for. I am not alone.

2020/1/17

Arabella made breakfast this morning. I woke up to food spread out on a kitchen table and a cheerful, albeit slightly nervous, face there to greet me. I can not help but feel that I do not deserve this little bit of happiness in my life, not after what I have done.

“Good morning,” I managed to greet the girl. I spoke first again as I had yesterday. Arabella seemed a bit uncertain and wary still and I do not blame her in the least.

“Good morning,” she returned in a guarded voice. It is oddly satisfying in my opinion that she does not seem to completely trust me yet. She would be an idiot to do so. And yet, by the end of breakfast we were chatting amiably as though we were old friends.

We seem to automatically trust each other on some level. I believe it is because we would not want to do anything else. As possibly the only to humans left alive we both assume that the other is not going to pull any underhanded tricks. Neither of us wants to be alone, that certain, and we both know it.

I have taken quite a liking to this girl. I have just met her and already I trust her with my whole soul. I can tell that she is kind, gentle, and as innocent as one can be in this world. I want to get to know her and providing that we both survive I feel sure that I will.

I feel a strange desire to tell her all about myself but first I will look into that troublesome town barricade. Something is odd here and I am determined to find out what it is. I sense that is is important though I cannot as yet say why .

 

Dymphna.

 

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A Beginning in the End pt. 20

Arabella                                                                                                            2020/1/15

I decided I needed to do something today. I can’t just do nothing all of the time. I can’t become complacent or I will inevitably die though it may take longer here than out there. The thing is that I’m not really sure what to do.

I have the feeling that I am here for a reason, that I have to stay here until I figure out what that is. I feel as if I have landed in a sort of strange stasis. I am in a bubble here, a surreal sphere containing me in illusionary safety.

I wandered out into the town today, savoring the air and sunshine. The dead moaned outside but I couldn’t hear them within the barricaded town. The smell of rotting flesh has mostly cleared from my senses. I don’t think the smell will ever vanish entirely because of how rooted in memory it is but – hold on. I see something across the square. What in the world?!

Logan                                                                                                                2020/1/15

I can’t believe it. It can’t be, not after everything that’s happened to me and the long years of near hopelessness. I saw something today that I can’t believe no matter how much I want it to be real.

I moved out into the town today, exploring the strange and surreal environment. As I entered the square I saw something that at first I assumed was just my tired imagination and wishful thinking. There appeared to be a young woman standing on the other side. She didn’t notice me at first and I found myself helplessly staring in disbelief.

She had sun-bleached blond hair, was about average height and her build was all lean muscle. Her clothes were bedraggled but appeared clean and her overall appearance was well kept considering the world she was forced to inhabit.

I just stared not believing that I could actually be looking at another living human being. She didn’t notice me at first. She seemed lost in her thoughts, staring at the silent town surrounding us both.

In a moment she caught sight of me. Her eyes grew wider than I had ever seen a person’s go. She just stared at me for one long instant, her eyes startled and afraid. Suddenly she turned and ran, fleeing back into the town. I instinctively took off after her but she was too fast for me and I lost her in the maze of residential homes and streets.

I went back to my house feeling like I was, and still am, in a dream. I wonder if I actually saw her or if maybe I am finally losing it completely. I want to go search for her but I am held back by the fear that she is not real. I feel as though I won’t be able to go on if I find out that she isn’t anything more than a figment of my imagination.

Tomorrow I’ll go back to the square in the hopes of seeing her again. For now I do not have the courage to know if what I saw was the truth or my crazed psyche.

 

Dymphna.

A Beginning in the End pt.19

Arabella                                                                                   2020/1/13

I did nothing today. For once I found myself with the opportunity to do absolutely nothing whatsoever. I lay abed until almost noon, dozing on and off in the sunlight. I had so many dreams in those hours. Mostly they were about finding a companion. I feel the loneliness more poignantly than ever these days.

My heart aches and my soul yearns for another human heart to connect with. My ears seem to be failing from lack of use and part of me wonders if I would even recognize another human voice were I to hear one. I can barely remember what a human voice sounds like. My memory is fading.

I’m not sure I could believe another person was real even if I did meet one. What would I say, would it be an illusion, a hallucination? How could I even begin to accept that another human was real?

Logan                                                                                          2020/1/14

I found something today, something odd and yet very exciting. I’ve never seen anything like it before, a town silent and still fully barricaded. No sound comes from within and there are very few monsters about. The barricade appears unbroken but I won’t attempt to breach it tonight. I’ll wait until the morning with the dawn to see what is behind those abandoned defenses.

I feel that something is coming, that something is about to happen but I don’t know what exactly. All I know is that my whole body is tingling in anticipation of an unknown event. Something is going to happen though whether good or bad I can only wait and find out.

I found this outlying farmhouse and slew the monsters within. There are still some provisions here, enough to tide me over for a short time. That town intrigues me and it looks like the most likely place for peace that I have seen since the world fell to pieces. I feel drawn there as I haven’t been drawn to a place in years. For the first time in ages I look forward to tomorrow.

2020/1/15

The barricade is unbroken as I suspected. I scaled it and found myself looking out on an empty town. It looked untouched by the dead, almost as perfect as the day when the world fell. Nothing was broken and aside from weather wear and the pile of burned ashes in the square it looks preserved.

I knew before I even dropped into the street that there are no dead in this place. It is empty of the monsters but there is no sign of violence. No blood spatters the houses and no bodies lie in the street. There is a peace about this place, a strange piece. The moans can’t be heard in here and the smell is almost entirely absent. It is quiet and almost like a piece of the world broken off from the rest of the universe and held apart.

I found a house here to stay in for the night. The place has been stocked for at least several years. They obviously planned to hold out for as long as possible. I wonder what happened to them in the end? It appears that the people here were very well prepared. I want to know what happened that they are no longer here.

I’ll explore the town tomorrow but for now I feel safer here than I have felt in years. The barricade is strong, having held up for many years and the monsters appear to have lost interest. They apparently haven’t noticed my arrival. I feel oddly relieved and without my permission my guard has begun to fall.

None-the-less I forced myself to lock the doors and windows. I have taken all the necessary precautions and now I am going to sleep. I actually feel as though I can sleep tonight. My mind has not settled but it has stopped running. I am suddenly so very tired. I can barely keep my eyes open.

I feel much more peaceful here than I have felt in years but the loneliness suddenly feels so much stronger. It pierces my heart with a pang like no other. I have never felt the loneliness this acutely before. I am safer than I have been in an excruciatingly long time and I think that makes the isolation hurt that much more.

I thought that I was immune to these feelings by now. I thought that I was past all of this but I was wrong. I miss the company of other people more than ever in this place. I’m going to sleep where I will hopefully find relief from the pain.

 

Dymphna

 

 

 

 

A Beginning in the End pt. 15

Arabella                                                                                                                   

Excerpts from Found Journal Continued

2012/7/3

We started the barricade today. The epidemic hasn’t reached us yet and I think we might still have some time. Even so you can feel fate closing in on us and there is no escape. We’ve already lost the T.V. and the internet is crawling. You can still make some calls but they are hardly going through anymore. Soon we shall be completely cut off from the outside world.

2012/6/17

The barricade is almost finished and just in time. We saw the first of those things over the top of it today. I never could have imagined something like that. It was literally a walking corpse. It ambled along, jerking its limbs and moaning. I’ve never heard such a horrendous sound from any creature.

I don’t think I can do it justice with words and I’m not sure that I want to. It’s like living in a nightmare now whereas before it was just sort of surreal. I will admit that I am personally terrified.

No one knows exactly what is going on or when it might end. We are trapped here even though as yet we have only seen one of those things. We have enough food to last us several years if we ration correctly. Maybe we really can survive but will it be worth it?

2012/6/20

It’s been quiet here for the last several days with no sign of the creatures. It feels like the calm before the storm. Everyone is quiet as if speaking will bring all of hell upon us. Maybe it would, who knows? All I know is that we are waiting for something and whatever it is, it is not good. It is just the opposite.

2012/6/30

Several of those things passed by today. Nobody made a sound, everyone just listened to the unearthly moans and held their breath. I don’t know if the things can hear or smell or if we were just that good at hiding but they didn’t detect our presence. They moved on and left us alone. I wonder who they used to be?

2012/7/7

I can hardly believe what I saw today. I can’t think how else to describe what I saw today. I can’t think how else to describe it except that a herd of those monsters cam through today. I was the most terrifying thing I could ever have imagined and then beyond, far beyond.

The smell! Just that was enough to make me vomit in the street. The stench of rotting flesh was everywhere in everything and it still lingers in the air. I refuse to count the number of times I have emptied my stomach  today. Sometimes it is by fear of the monsters that my stomach lurches and then it is by fear of the future itself that my insides turn.

Then there were the moans. You can’t even imagine them until you hear it for yourself. Their tongues don’t work anymore so it is different from the moan of a sick person or something like that. It is different and it is absolutely horrifying. I’m not even sure how to describe it. It’s not something that I had ever heard the lie of back before all of this began.

I can still hear the sound echoing through my brain, pounding in my memory. What could do that to a body, bring it back to life like that? What kind of unforeseen horror has descended upon this world?

 

Dymphna

 

 

A Beginning in the End pt. 10

Logan                                                                                                              2020/1/9

I didn’t really want to leave that house behind today but what choice did I really have? Part of me wanted to stay, wanted to make that house a home again. I left it regretfully and not before slaying the dozen or something monsters around the place.

I didn’t doubt that more of the things would soon come around. I didn’t like to think about it.

I walked thirty miles today but I couldn’t stop thinking about that house and the people who had once lived there. For all I know I killed them for the second time out there. Not that it actually matters anymore. What difference would it have made if I had known who those monsters once were? None at all that’s the difference.

All of the things infesting this land were once people, people with names and lives. I killed so many of them on the road today, indiscriminately waylaying on them. my blood lust was up today, more than usual. I think it was that house. It roused me somehow, my hatred for the monsters reigniting. It never died of course but it had faded in my heart to a dim ember.

They still haunt the roads although there are no travelers anymore besides myself. They still wander among the cars as if something might yet linger there.

I wonder sometimes if there isn’t something else in those rotting brains. Do they realize that cars are associated with humans and humans are food? Is there still some animal faculty left in those neurons besides insatiable hunger? I don’t know and I’m not sure that I want to.

My heart is restless tonight and I don’t know why. I found this military outpost and barricaded myself in one of the guard towers for the night. I don’t feel safe but I’m probably safer here than I have been in a long time.

Later

Their moans woke me up. It must be about one in the morning. I don’t know how they figured out I was here but they are swarming down there. There must be two dozen of them and more coming every minute.

I feel strangely calm here, calm enough to write. I don’t know how i’m going to get out of this one but I feel sure that I’ll find a way. I’ve gotten out of worse situations before.

Dymphna

A Beginning in the End pt. 5

Logan                                                                                              2020/1/6

Another monotonous day gone. I still listen to the radio everyday but there is nothing there. The last time I was able to get a signal was about three years ago now. The last thing I heard was a man’s voice out of some nowhere town that I can’t even remember the name of. It was an old man just calling out for another human being.

I couldn’t make it to him. The town was still swamped in the monsters and the barricade was too much of a risk. I tried to contact the man but something interfered. I don’t really know what the interference was but it kept me from communicating with that poor old man. I feel sure that he died alone.

I never did go into the town though I wanted to. It wasn’t worth the risk especially not after the old man was dead.

the devastation I felt when that voice was gone was like nothing I had ever felt before. When my family died it was different. they weren’t the last or the only people left. They were family so it was devastating but it wasn’t the same. When that old man’s voice stopped I had never felt so entirely alone.

His was the first voice I’d heard for months and i had no idea if we might have been the last two people on earth. The thought that i might be the last man alive was the most horrifying and shocking thought. The worst part was how possible it was. It made me ask myself why I was even trying. Why was I surviving? What reason had I to continue living if i was all that was left?

Dymphna

A Beginning in the End pt. 4

Arabella                                                                                                      2020/1/5

For five years I’ve been wandering in a world where there is no peace. It was another long day on those horrible roads with the monsters moaning on every side. All I can hear is the sound of the dead moans in my head. I hear them in my dreams at night and feel their dead fingers on my skin.

I wake in the middle of the night in a cold sweat but even then I cannot scream. I still have too much self preservation to cry out in my sleep. I don’t think I even truly sleep anymore for the wakeful fear in my heart. My brain can’t rest and after earlier tonight I’m more on edge than ever.

I was as silent as is humanly possible but somehow they still heard me. I heard them approach behind me, moaning and tripping over themselves. The fear was slow in rising but it came all the same. I fled for my life while still trying to make as little noise as possible. It was absolutely horrible, being chased by those things again. I hadn’t been pursued like that for some time. I had managed to stay out of their sights for a long while. I hadn’t been pursued with that fear in my heart since early on after the world had just fallen.

I was only fifteen when it all fell apart. I remember not really understanding what was happening. It had swept the globe before we had realized what was happening. We were swept into a nightmare before we had a chance to react.

It’s all a blur even now after years of wandering through a wasteland. I don’t know if most of the ordinary people ever really understood what happened. Those who did are long gone in the first days of the epidemic. I’ll never know what really occurred and I no longer care.

Why would it matter? Knowing how it happened doesn’t change the world that I must live in. No matter how it came about I must now deal with the effects of it. It hardly matters if it won’t do the world any good. It would only matter if the virus could be killed by something out of the past.

I remember something about a vaccine but it never came to anything. I don’t think there was ever a vaccine at all. It was all idle talk to keep people from panicking. It meant nothing in the end. I think there was a placebo vaccine near the beginning and I can only imagine how horrified those people were when it failed. They had no idea it wasn’t real.

I don’t know why I’m writing all of this. Who will ever read what I write? If I am the last living human then what is the point? My words will never matter surely. After all history doesn’t matter except for the sake of my own sanity. I have to remember what life was like before everything turned. I have to know that this broken world isn’t all that there ever was. I need to remember that a better world existed once to give me hope that a beautiful one can be again.

I have to hope even if there is no sign that the world will ever change. I can’t live if I don’t hold onto hope. Hope is all that I have left.

Dymphna